Pausing is a skill and gets easier with practice. Think of it like a muscle: if you’ve been giving in to your impulses all the time, this muscle is quite flabby. It will get firmer with continual practice.

Sometimes there is no need or feeling being expressed and you just want that darn cookie. Then you need to pause and ask yourself, “Is this aligned with what I really want?” And I don’t mean what you want in the moment, but in the long term. Sometimes the answer will be yes and sometimes it will be no.

You can still lose weight having a cookie occasionally, truly savoring it, and eating it mindfully. But let’s get real; you can’t eat every cookie or dessert you’re tempted by. This is the recipe for obesity.

You can have it all, just not all the time, and not in large amounts. This is where moderation and limits come in. The only way to set limits is to be able to delay gratification. Without it, you’re a slave to your desires and impulses, and that long term goal will remain forever a distant dream.