Hi ,
As a coach, I would say the one trait that most of my clients share in common is perfectionism. Some people think
being a perfectionist requires expectations of perfection in every area but it often shows up in just a few areas, including the area of food and weight. I too used to be a perfectionist. I now call myself a recovering perfectionist, as it only rears its ugly head on rare occasions.
I lost a lot of my life to perfectionism. It kept me paralyzed from taking risks and trying new
things which meant I didn’t grow and therefore move forward. It kept me stuck for years. I avoided new challenges like the plague or I would briefly try things (like diets), but soon quit them when I felt I couldn’t do them perfectly or master them quickly enough.
I stayed safe in my comfort zone by only doing things that I already knew I could
do. Because I compared myself against the yardstick of perfection, nothing I ever did was good enough, therefore I felt I wasn’t good enough either. Because of this, I never felt satisfied about the way I looked, or the talents I had, or anything I ever
accomplished.
Perfectionism destroys confidence and belief in yourself. If you feel you can’t measure up or you’re not going to be perfect or successful, you won't try very hard, and this is what happened to me.
I did the ultimate perfectionist cop out; I
stopped trying at all. I went clear to the other extreme and had no expectations of myself at all. If I didn’t expect anything out of myself, I certainly couldn’t fail myself, now could I?
This resulted in me spending some years in my 20’s wandering aimlessly, depressed, and overeating to fill in the gaps of all that I had
lost.
Do you see yourself in this cautionary tale?
Perfectionism can keep you fat, stuck, safe, and ultimately it can suck the very life out you. If left unchallenged and unchecked, it can result in an unlived life, or at least, a safe life that doesn’t change or challenge you much. It can also cost you money and time, as it can keep you from taking risks and growing in your career.
If you want to break free from the chains of perfectionism, the first thing you need to do is to give yourself permission to make mistakes and even fall flat on your face. You need to reframe how you view mistakes. Mistakes aren’t bad; they’re how you learn and grow.
Falling flat on your face is one of the best things that can happen to a perfectionist. I know, because I’ve done it many times. The reason it’s so wonderful is that you learn you can survive it; it’s not such a big deal after all. It then frees you up to take bigger risks and your life is only as big as the risks you’re willing to take.
Fear of making mistakes is all about ego and image. You’re trying to preserve an image of yourself as perfect or you have a fear of being judged, criticized, looking foolish, or worse yet, dumb.
When you can accept you’re human and fallible like everybody else, you become more humble and willing to put yourself out there and you don’t have to appear like you’ve got it all together. You can surrender fully to the process and that’s when life, weight loss, and any others changes become a heck of a lot more fun.
Andy Warhol used to say, “Sometimes people let the same problem make them miserable for years when they could just say, so what.” When you can fall on your face, get back up, and say, "So what", you’re well on your way to being a recovering perfectionist.
P. S. If you find some typos in this newsletter...well, so what!
Are you ready to drop pounds of perfectionism? Learn the art of self-care and mindful eating, and create a life that nurtures you.
If you're ready to experience freedom around food and weight, now is the time to take advantage of this special opportunity to work one on one with me! You can purchase now and can begin at any time in the next 6 months, even in January!
I am offering $300 off my personalized, private coaching program. This consists of 12 weekly sessions and then monthly follow up sessions for 3 months. Regularly $899 now, until November 30th you can purchase it for $599. The good news is that if you're not ready to use it, you don't have to begin until January or later!
If you have a lot of weight to lose or need long term support to help overcome your emotional eating, I am offering a full year of coaching for $999. This consists of 24 half hour sessions that you can use throughout the year as you see fit. For example, you can start out weekly for 12 weeks doing my personal coaching program and use the rest as needed throughout the year. This is a
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Offer ends November 30th!
Coaching can make the difference between success and failure.
Coaching can help you:
- Let go of dieting and bingeing and become a more intuitive, mindful eater
- Develop realistic weight loss goals and a daily action plan to achieve those goals
- Teach you better self-care and stress management
- Reconnect with your feelings, body, hopes, and dreams
- Develop a healthier relationship with food, as well as life itself
- Learn self-forgiveness and practice loving-kindness
- Eliminate black and white thinking, perfectionism, and other thinking distortions
- Release self-defeating patterns around food and weight
- Develop a deeper connection to your inner wisdom
- Improve your body image
I coach and mentor people in the areas of: permanent weight loss, food addiction, compulsive, emotional overeating, binge eating recovery, intuitive and mindful eating, meditation, self care and stress management, self-esteem and body image issues, and weight loss using the law of attraction.
Note: My work is inner focused, not religious, and fits with any belief system you may have, even agnostic. My work assumes that you have all the wisdom and answers you need inside of you.What you call this place — God, intuition, Higher Power, inner wisdom, or true self — is up to you. I am simply a guide bringing you back to the truths that are already inside of you.
The beauty of my coaching is that it is tailored to your individual needs. You are not given a “cookie cutter” commercial program, nor are you prescribed a certain diet. You are given tools and support that are appropriate to your lifestyle, personality type, life stage and needs. My methods also complement any weight management plan you may be currently following.
The goal of my coaching is to create a lighter, balanced, healthier, nourishing and joy-filled life. You will begin to see results in all areas of your life because how you do food is how you do life!
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